– by Marla Evans
You want me to eat WHAT???
I’m a mother’s dream! I love food, all kinds of food. Love trying new foods. Mom never had any trouble getting me to eat what was on my plate. I even loved my veggies (how odd is THAT?). Yes, broccoli and Brussels sprouts are my favorite foods. I’m weird. I get it.
My list of NO WAY foods is very short so I figured this 21 day challenge thing would be a breeze for me. Lots of new veggies? OH YEAH! Then I got this week’s menu…. I looked at the Preparation Week at a Glance and saw all the fun dishes in store for me – Fruit Soup, Snow Bunny Smoothie, Pink ‘n Green Smoothie. COOL!
I took off for the grocery store to pick up all my goodies. Had a wonderful time looking over all the beautiful fruits and picking out new greens (rainbow chard is gorgeous!). Started on the veggie section: avocado, broccoli, then there it was (cue eerie music)… I can’t do it. I can’t even LOOK at that! The smell….the taste…the texture….My whole body shudders at the thought of having to put THAT in my mouth! NO! It…it’s…it’s…
**** CELERY! ****
NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
I know, I know….celery has negative calories. It takes more calories to digest celery than celery has in it. It’s (I think) a diuretic. And what woman doesn’t appreciate that every few weeks?
I’m sure it has lots of other wonder properties. But it’s
CELERY!
Gag. OK…grocery store pep talk. I’m sure the other shoppers thought I’d lost my mind standing there in the produce section next to the celery mumbling under my breath.
I’m in this challenge. What’s a challenge without a little difficulty? I can do this. I CAN learn to at least tolerate celery. I WON’T learn to like it, but I’ll at least aim for tolerance. OK. Reach for the celery.
SHUDDER!
It’s in the grocery cart. Move along quickly before it ends up back on the shelf. I make it home with my mound of produce (the list filled the entire shopping cart!). Got everything cleaned and put in the fridge ready to start my challenge.
Day One was wonderful! Morning smoothie with banana, apple and spinach (store was out of kale). YUM! Lunch was a beautiful and VERY filling bowl of fruit that took me all afternoon to get down. Didn’t even want dinner. Day one was so yummy I totally forgot what was lurking in my fridge….
I woke up on Day Two eagerly looking forward to the delicious concoction that awaited me. Got out my beloved Blendtec and opened my binder to Day Two.
AAAHHHHH!! THERE IT WAS!
Not just a piece, not just one stalk. Oh no! You want me to eat THREE STALKS OF CELERY???
I can’t.
No way.
NOOOO!!!
BREATHE!
Ok. I said I could learn to at least tolerate this revolting food. I can do this, I can do this, I can do this….
Tossed the bananas in the blender, the raspberries and the water. Reluctantly picked up the celery and put two stalks (ok, I’m trying here!) in the blender. Fired it up before I changed my mind. Took every ounce of will power to take that first sip. I just knew that horrible celery would over power the yummy bananas and berries.
But I did it! And I survived!
Not only did I survive that first sip – it was pretty good!
WOW!
Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think anything with CELERY in it could be tasty! I could tell the celery was in there, but it was a light after thought not an overpowering tyrant. It actually tasted rather “summery.” Who’d a thunk it? So I finished off my breakfast with a sense of pride in myself and went off to face my day.
Day Three – “I’m baaa-ck!” This morning’s smoothie calls for 4-6 stalks of celery….Can I do it?
YOU BET!
Plopped 4 of those babies in there and happily slurped away. Thanks, Green Smoothie Queen, for helping me overcome such a huge barrier in my culinary journey!
*******
Celery Stalks
Sigman/Harris/Bradley
(Additional lyrics by Al Simmons)
Celery stalks at midnight,
Lurking in the moonlight,
What’s this funny nightmare all about?
Celery stalks at midnight,
I’m glad I’ve got my flashlight,
I can see the broccoli juggling brussel sprouts.
It’s like a bad dream,
A crazy sort of bad dream.
Must have been something
That I ate no doubt.
Look at that potato putting on his shades,
Claims he won them in a raffle,
Now he’s climbing a tree,
Flirtin’ with an apple.
What’s causing this vegetation migration?
The tomato is far ahead of the others calling,
“Ketchup, ketchup, where have you bean?
Let’s get to the root of this problem.
Tell the flowers to get out of their beds.”
But the romaine held her ground crying,
“Leaf me alone, lettuce wait,
I don’t carrot what you say,
Something might turnip,
You and the cabbage go on a-head.”
All eyes are on the potato, and the beat…goes on
It’s like a bad dream
A crazy sort of mad dream
Must have been something that I ate
No doubt.
Celery stalks at midnight
Lurking in the moonlight
What’s this funny nightmare all about?
“Its some sort of evil garden plot”!
Find The Celery Stalks at Midnight album on the Al Simmons website!
Have a veggie you’ve been meaning to wrastle? 😉 Join the 21-Day Green Smoothie Detox and give peas a chance.