It’s Hard To Be A Martyr

by Lisa Marie Lindenschmidt

Does this ring a bell for you? You’re unloading your groceries onto the conveyor belt at your local grocery store. You’re throwing organic, grain-fed chicken (for your raw dog, of course) up there, some local apples, maybe a couple of boxes of shee-shee organic tea harvested specially from some little town in the Andes where the only source of income for the indigenous peoples are from the farming of this tea… As you’re piling up your well-thought-out purchases, you happen to glance at the customer’s cart behind you. You notice the Ho-Hos, the frozen Hungry Man dinners, the drums of Sunny D, and can after can of meat chili. Your eyes nonchalantly travel up to the customer himself. You see a man with someone you presume is his son. Both are heavy, looking disheveled, and generally conveying an air of grump. You mentally shake your head and start connecting the dots from their diet to their appearance. After you pay for your groceries, you walk out of the store praising yourself for having the intelligence to rise above the muck and mire of the SAD diet.

Or what about this one? You make a beautiful dinner for your family of baked delicata squash, brown rice with local, raw, organic butter, and a hearty kale salad. When it’s time to serve up everyone’s plate, you cram your plate with kale salad, taking only minuscule amounts of the rice and squash. You serve everyone else’s plate to their liking, making sure they’ve seen the portion ratio on your plate. Once their plates are clean, they head back up to the stove for a second helping… of rice and butter. You say, “There’s plenty of kale salad left, if you want some of that, too,” but they decline. You mentally shake your head and start connecting the dots from their diet to any malady they may currently be experiencing. As you’re cleaning up, you eye the rice and butter, wanting another serving. Of course, you can’t because that would send the wrong message to the other family members that look up to you for guidance on their health quest.

It’s hard to be the martyr. I know. I’ve been one for years. I think I am coming to the realization that others may not be perceiving me as a martyr though. This is shocking. I have invested a lot of time researching nutrition, a lot of money trying out different recipes, and a lot of energy being the example for others. How dare they not understand all I am doing to sacrifice myself for their health?!?! … OK. So, of course, I am saying all this tongue-in-cheek, but this is a real issue – for me and for other women I know. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about this recently because I’ve found myself exhausted, exhausted from always having to be “on,” always having to make the “right” decision. I’ve been living my life for other people’s reactions. But in mulling this over, another thought came to the fore: Is judging wrong? And where does compassion fit into all this?

This compassion thing is new to me. I was never taught this concept outright as a child. Therefore, my understanding of it has gotten all screwed up. My husband says compassion literally means “to suffer with.” What if you could break everything down to suffering – meaning, somehow or another our needs are not being met on some level? Could we be better equipped to relate to others? I believe we could because then the emotional baggage that we create around judging would be a moot point.

Many of us get mired in defining judging as something bad. But it is not the judging that is bad; it is what you do with this judging that defines the quality of the judgement. The literal definition of judgement is “the cognitive process of reaching a decision or drawing conclusions; the mental ability to understand and discriminate between relations.” So, if we see someone in a grocery store with a buggy loaded down with processed food, we can make a judgement or draw a conclusion about that particular person. But, and herein lies the rub: listen to yourself as you are judging. What conclusions have you drawn? How are you characterizing that person? Are your conclusions helpful or compassionate? What is your investment in judging this person in a certain way? Does your judgement validate you in any way?

These are hard questions. It takes a heck of a person to be able to go through this process and respond honestly and, most importantly, to act compassionately. But the first place to start is with yourself: how are you judging yourself? And, more importantly, are you able to respond to that judgement compassionately? Can you respect the path you are on as a process?

That’s your homework assignment. Let me know how you do. As for myself, I think I’ve got a special place for that Martyr Award… in the closet.

Lisa Marie Lindenschmidt is a raw foods chef and teacher and owner of Rite Food and Company (www.ritefoodandcompany.com), which offers workshops on intentional and joyful eating. Lisa Marie and her homeschooled daughter, Mo, record a weekly podcast – called Sweet Peas Podcast – chronicling their raw foods journey together.

In Chlorophyll I Trust, For Chocolate Cravings I Will Bust

Hey there, frisky critters. I’ve been slimed!

I can’t believe how I have upped the green quotient this week! I’m practically impressed with myself. I’ve fallen in love with one of the green supplements we’re using in the 6-Week Detox. As a multi-tasking, somewhat over-ambitious, self-employed, single-mother, being able to drop a blob of swamp scum in water and call it a meal is a luxury I can handle. To top it all off, by upping my greens I have completely handled my chocolate cravings. Amazing!

Those of you who were listening in on my consultation with Dr. Ritamarie know that I have to give up the chocolate for a while. Interesting reasons why, too, but a bit too juicy for the blog. You’ll have to listen in to the consultation if you want to know why.

I’m SOoooooOOOooo glad I’ve given myself this week to wean myself off a few foods. I’m both fascinated and shocked at how completely unconscious my food choices are sometimes. This detox is challenging me in so many ways. Last night MAC took me on a date. We just went to a cozy, nearby bistro where I ordered tea and a salad. He ordered other stuff that probably tasted great but were most certainly NOT on the menu. Thanks to the ho-ho-holy-cow-did-I-ever-eat-too-much disease of the holidays, I have been a bit more liberal than usual in my finger-dipping. Last night I observed myself putting back new boundaries and resisting the formerly-irresistible foods I’d been nibbling on. I admit that the most effective trick for me was massaging the cyst on the side of my cheek.

*sigh*

Why do we wait until there’s a problem before we prioritize our health? I guess prevention is a pretty good medicine. Feeling the little lump on my cheek is just a reminder to keep things in check. I’ve spent the week weaning myself off most things, but have until Monday to reach my 100% liquid diet ideal which I’ll be carrying out for the next 6 weeks.

**Several hours later…*

Oh oh! What a revelation.

MAC just left for New York for the weekend. Sitting here alone, I think I finally understand my relationship to food. Looks like I’ll be white-knuckling through the weekend. This detox is forcing me to make some pretty strong evaluations and observations about my food choices. Like this one:

You can eat all the great food, fancy superfoods and Omega fatty acids you want, but you if you don’t sit down, relax and CHEW, CHEW, CHEW your food, you’re wasting money, time and creating toxicity. So, simply practicing the art of eating, sitting and chewing with patience requires a rather significant act of discipline for me.

As for our 21-Day Challenge challenge, all this talk of detox doesn’t mean you’re off the hook for cleaning up your house and sorting your finances for the year! I recommend taking a bit of time to look through the categories we laid out at the beginning:

1. Attitude
2. Fitness/Activity
3. Spirituality/Creative Expression
4. Sensuality
5. Health
6. Family
7. Relationships
8. Beauty
9. Home
10. Money/Abundance.

Have you taken the time to review the different areas in your life? I had a 2-hour accounting meeting and a another one with my banker, so I can scratch the financial review off the list. This is definitely an area where I have a lot of room for improvement. (I seem to prefer focusing on the green stuff with chlorophyll in it.)

Since MAC is gone for the weekend, I’ll be focusing on some of my professional and personal goals. I’ll be spending some time going through clothes, and getting some of the things I need for my apartment. For those of you who are a bit more settled than I am, you may want to try our 30-Day Clutter Free Diva program. In order to help inspire you with your new year’s resolutions and start the year off right, we’ve put this program on a temporary half-price offer. It’s one of our best, but lesser-known programs. We just spend so darn much time talkin’ about food, we forget to talk about the declutter program, but it is an AMAZING program for anyone wanting to spiff up the home front.

In just a few moments we’ve got a support call for the 6-Week Detox.

I think I need it.

Love and loney vibes,

Tera

From SAD to Smiles!

I know by the time February rolls around, it seems like my mood and emotions permanently set up camp in the basement, and they choose the dreariest and most miserable corner of that basement they can find.  Then they turn out the lights until about June.  This year, my goal is to fight back!  And thanks to Kate, I now have some great ingredients in my arsenal!

‘Blue’ Smoothies!

- by Kate Nicholson

Boost your mood with a smoothie!

Any fellow sufferers feeling a little blue from S.A.D. (Seasonal Affective Disorder) as winter inches its way along will be cheered by these happy-making ingredients for ‘Beat-the-Blues’ smoothies…

To the usual mix of 40% green leafy veggies and 60% of fruit, try adding any of the following…

• Sesame seeds: these are one of the richest sources of the amino acid threonine (low levels of which are one of the culprits for depression). A spoonful of raw tahini mixes best.
• A teaspoon of raw chocolate powder (high quantities of phenols, antioxidants which boost the mood) and N-acylethanoloamine, a chemical which stimulates the brain to produce endorphins.
• Nuts are a good source of omega-3′s, B-vitamins, magnesium and protein, all providing mood-enhancing qualities. Hazelnuts and almonds are particularly good for supporting the nervous system.
• Bananas: starchy carbohydrate which helps to produce serotonin.
• Broccoli sprouts, which contain folate, a natural protection against depression, plus you get as much antioxidant in 25grams of broccoli sprouts as you would if you ate 1.36 kilograms of fully grown broccoli.
• Parsley: an abundant supplier of B-vitamins. Also a good source of glutamine, a potent brain food, and essential nutrient for healing.
• Avocado: rich in omega-3′s, lecithin (protects cells from oxidation and largely makes up the protective sheaths surrounding the brain) and also acts as a ‘nutrient-booster’ enabling the body to absorb antioxidants more efficiently.
• Raw honey: contains small amounts of antioxidants and is wonderful for busting S.A.D. sugar cravings!

Experiment and enjoy! And don’t forget a good dose of daily fresh air – even if the sun isn’t shining!

The Birthing Process

by Lisa Marie Lindenschmidt

In the Pagan tradition, Yule is the birthing time. The Goddess is great with child and is in labor to bring forth the Sun. The Winter Solstice also being the longest night of the year symbolizes that deep doubt and darkness that we can sometimes feel as we are going through our own birthing processes. And so, instead of mourning the fear and moaning over the pain, the Goddess encourages us to have hope and to celebrate this new birth, to create a welcoming home for this new child.

Yeah. Right.

You know, when I put my family’s traditions in the context of this lovely story, it’s easy to feel like the world will just fall into place. Hey, I remember when I gave birth. I wasn’t thinking about celebrating and latch-hooking the welcome mat; I wanted this kid out! And I think that’s how most of us approach change. We don’t want to go through all the labor, all the pains, the gradual transitioning, the learning process. We don’t want to enjoy the sites along the way; we want to just Be There.

The other day, Mo was relating a story to me about her views on spirituality. She ended it by saying, “I don’t want a religion; I want a relationship.” This was profound for me. She’s been frustrated lately by the idea of boxing her religion – and I would wager her beliefs in general – into the one category of Paganism. We have both been beginning to feel that our views, our ethics, our principles for life are more encompassing. I think that Paganism being an Earth-centric philosophy and religion (some would argue that Paganism isn’t a religion… but that’s another article) still works for me on a lot of levels. The stories are beautifully symbolic and keep me grounded in the Wheel of the Year and the happenings of my internal and external environments. But Mo’s point is well-taken: to be in relationship implies that the person has an intimate ongoing communication with whatever it is that person is calling Divine (or God or Goddess or whatever works best for you).

The idea of being in relationship with something means that you not only have to value the thing or person that you are in relationship with, but you also must value the process of that eternally-changing relationship. And let’s admit it: this sucks. OK. Maybe not with all things. But I am thinking specifically of my relationships with food and money. And, of course, let’s not forget about those relationships with people you can’t change, like my sometimes angst-filled daughter and my oftentimes pig-headed husband! I’m kidding about the relationship with them sucking, but you get my point: being in relationship means that you have to consider the other party’s opinions, input, influence. And this can be incredibly difficult – especially in relationships with inanimate objects like food or money.

So, where do we start with acknowledging relationship? How can we find peace with this sometimes painful process? Is it possible to recognize the path as a awe-inspiring, even a joy-riddled one?

The hard truth is that this whole process starts with you admitting that you have to stand where you are at all times. You have to start with saying, “OK. I am right here, right now. Now what is the best decision I can make? What does this relationship feel like right now? Where do I want it to go? How can I work with in order to get where I want?” And most importantly… you have to be willing to let go of outcome. This is the sucky part.

The part of the story that I like most about the Goddess giving birth to the Sun is this idea of faith: will the Sun return? Because the bottom line is that none of us really know for sure. The irony here is that most of us have more faith in the returning of the sun each day than we do in our relationships with people or finances. Can we put ourselves in a situation of unconditional trust in the Universe? Will we be taken care of? Will others reciprocate our love? Will we heal ourselves from our past? Will we make good choices around parenting our children? And will we be forgiven when we don’t?

We are in relationship with everything around us. How can we nurture those relationships defines the benefits we get. I don’t believe this is selfish. I believe this is a necessary part of thriving as a human being.

Lisa Marie Lindenschmidt is a raw foods chef and teacher and owner of Rite Food and Company (www.ritefoodandcompany.com), which offers workshops on intentional and joyful eating. Lisa Marie and her homeschooled daughter, Mo, record a weekly podcast – called Sweet Peas Podcast – chronicling their raw foods journey together.

The Popeye Punch!

by Kate Nicholson

As a long-term vegetarian, I’ve suffered from chronic mild anaemia for the last ten years or so. It wasn’t until I switched to a raw vegan diet at the end of last year that my iron levels rocketed from a low-energy haemoglobin level of 10.4 to a ‘got to take the stairs at a run ‘cos I’ve got so much energy‘ 13.7!).  I’m attributing this to a regular intake of my favourite green smoothie – the Popeye Punch!

The Popeye Punch

(By Kate Nicholson)

1 cup of mixed organic berries
1 organic Fairtrade banana
2 handfuls of organic spinach
1 handful of organic parsley
1 tsp spirulina
filtered water to top up
splash of Agave (optional)

The vitamin C rich berries enhance the absorption of the bio-available iron from the spinach. There’s also a host of other health benefits to be gained from this delicious refreshing smoothie – spinach maintains good eyesight by helping to prevent age-related macula degeneration, and also protects against cancer and heart disease.

Bananas contain the mood-enhancer tryptophan and as Fairtrade bananas ensure better wages and working conditions for plantation workers (which consequently has a beneficial knock-on effect for their families) every one benefits! Karma points!

Enjoy!

References:

Adnani, S.  Health benefits of spinach.  Retrieved from

http://www.organicfacts.net/health-benefits/vegetable/health-benefits-of-spinach.html