Two Powerful Exercises To Ensure A Happy Home

This is not the post I was first thinking of writing, but in light of something that was going on at home with my family, I decided to write this instead.

Bear with me and I will explain.

First of all, as you all know, children in the same household do not always get along. Sometimes they have their differences. No matter how hard Mom and Dad might try to help them, there are times when our advice falls on deaf ears.

As you might have guessed, I like things to be happy and positive in our house. But I admit that lately, I feel like my head is going to explode from all the arguing that the children are doing.

What is going on?

Each one of my children is very sweet, giving, loving, helpful, and always thinking of others before themselves. They are great kids. So what is going on??!

Well I decided, to sit back and do some reflecting, praying, and observing. I figured out a lot of things, but I will tell you one that came to mind, that stands out to me, more then the others.

As a family, we have not been spending time together as much as we use to. Everyone has something they are doing, separate from everyone else in the family. For example: Adam my oldest is always out with his friends or working; Stefan my 17 year old is always busy drawing or making designs for this website that he helps out with; Jamie my 14 year old, is in his own little world and is happy to not have to play with his sister Kaylee; Kaylee, well, what can I say? She loves horses and riding, and would probably spend her life in the barn with the horses if I let her.

My husband Ray is a hard working man, he gets up every morning at 3 am to go to work. He gets home at 1:30 pm each day and has lunch with me, helps with some chores (ladies I have to say I’ve got it made, as he does my laundry-folding, as well as putting things on the clothes line). He then plays with Jamie and Kaylee if he’s not too tired.

And Me… well, I have a long list of chores that knows no end, (each of the children and Ray has chores they do every day as well), but as you all know mom is the glue that holds the house together.

Then there are the projects I’m working on like MY NEW BOOK, homeschooling, etc. When you add it all together, there’s a lot of back and forth, but not many lines are crossing in the middle, and when they do, there’s an argument taking place!

While spending time together is one thing, what’s that time worth if people aren’t actually, honestly communicating with each other? After much reflection and contemplation, here’s what we’ve decided to do as a family:

Each member of the family, (that’s right mom and dad, too) has to write two lists. They are written once a week, and a special day and time can be chosen to just take a few moments out of the day and make this happen. Consider getting a handsome book or journal for each member of the family as a kind of gift, to inspire them to want to write in it for this exercise.

The first list:

This one is a list of everyone in the family. Under each name you have to write a good quality that you like about that person. It can’t be made up, it has to be true about that person. (Writing about yourself, doesn’t count, though it too can be therapeutic.)

The second list:

The second list is a list of the things that you think would help to make everyone in the family happier.

You then have to pick which of the things on the second list you think would help the most, and try putting it into practice for an entire week yourself!

Let’s face it, it’s easy to dish out advice, but a lot tougher to do what it takes to apply these ideas and good habits.

Everything you write on these lists has to be positive and true. As parents, it’s your job to make sure that you create a positive, enjoyable space for this activity, as that will go a long way to ensuring you’re getting the positive, upbeat answers you need to actually inspire change and good communication.

Then with all the lists in tow, you gather together to talk as a family once a week.

That first list is very special as it helps each person to express positive things about the others in the family, and it’s a great boost for the person about whom things have been written. With habits like these in place, I’m sure you can imagine that the creation of a happy home gets a whole lot easier!

Just imagining all the positive, warm and loving feelings that will be flooding into your home all over again.

Ahhh a happy home, I like the sound of that.

I hope this can be useful to you and inspire better communication and an even happier home!

Take Care

Warm thoughts,

Monique

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